Trying to Remember

The wedding industry tell brides things they have to have. I get constant emails telling me that I have to have flowers, a big poofy dress, and a limo to drive my wedding party around. If I don't, my wedding isn't really a wedding.

So far, I've warded off the "have to's" pretty well. No church, flower, limo or big dresses here.

Unfortunately, there is one part of the wedding industry that I feel I need to have.

A wedding videographer.

When I first started planning my wedding, I saw that people were paying upwards of $2000 for a video of their wedding. I scoffed at throwing money away for a video that we'll probably never watch again and figured the pictures that our amazing photographer would capture would be enough.

Don't get me wrong, I loved the videos that have come out recently. They're much more cinematic and artistic instead of looking like Aunt Lora filmed the whole thing. I just couldn't justify spending $2000 or more on a video while keeping our budget.

I kept seeing wedding videos around (including probably the most famous video,) and the thought started creeping into my head that maybe, possibly, it would be nice to have. I ran the idea by Keegan and he flat out refused. He said he didn't like being on camera and the fact that his parents have a wedding video but never watched it solidified the fact that it was a waste of money.

I dropped the idea, but kept it in the back of my mind. As time passed, I realized that I just didn't want a wedding video, I kind of needed one. Not need in the sense that "I need because I want," but the fact that I'm 22 years old and I'm losing my memory.

I first noticed that I'm having trouble retaining memories about a year ago. Keegan and I went on a vacation together in the summer of 2009 to Gatlinburg, Tennessee. Looking back, I can't remember any of it. I know that we went hiking to see the waterfalls. I know that we spent time in a cabin. I know that we went and toured the local artist village. However, when I try to bring those images to my memory, I can't. I don't remember what anything looks like except the few pictures I have.

Another instance is the Flogging Molly concert Keegan and I went to in January 2011. I know that we, and her family, surrounded an 11 year old girl, shielding her from the title wave of drunk, dancing idiots, but I can't remember the band playing. I have no idea what songs they played, what any of them looked like up close (we were right up against the stage) or what the venue looked like. The only reason I remember the story about the little girl is because I've told the story over and over. I have no idea what she looks like, though.

I thought that my memory loss was due to the fact that I was on more medications than I have fingers. However, since getting off the medications, my memory hasn't improved. I still can't remember our vacation or the Flogging Molly Concert, but I'm also still having trouble retaining new memories.

My biggest fear is that in a year or two, I won't remember my wedding day. I want to remember my what my dad says as he marries us, I want to remember the vows that Keegan says to me. I want to remember the interacts I have with my friends and family. Pictures can only bring back so much and I'm afraid they won't be enough.

Over the weekend I confessed my worry to Keegan and he said that we could look into getting a wedding videographer. I searched Google for "wedding videographers in Columbia and Kansas City," but all of the ones that popped up were big companies that wanted more money than we can afford. I turned to Craigslist to see if there was a student advertising their services. I also asked my friend, Chelsea, who started Tiny Attic Productions to see if she'd be interested. I found a few companies on Craigslist who are more in my price range, but are still charging anywhere from $800-$1500 for their services.

I know that an option would be to ask a friend or family member to video our wedding, but I don't want to put my friends and family to work on a day that they should be hanging out and relaxing with us.

I haven't heard back from Chelsea or the people from Craigslist yet, so I guess we'll see what happens. If one of the companies off Craigslist responds to us, we'll have to do some major cutting in other areas to fit them into our budget. No more out of town bags for our guests, no more candy buffet or other fun personal details. I hate that it has come down to getting a videographer or providing things for our guests. So many of our guests are coming from out of city or state (or in my family, country,) so I want to give them the best experience to thank them for supporting us. However, in my heart, I know that our guests won't care if they got an out of town bag, but a potential wedding video will stay with us forever. Or at least until we lose the DVD.